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06 Apr
Published by erna_surjadi

Gender Based Violence can be prevented!


This term is known in various words such as: domestic violence, violence agaiant women, family violence and so on.

Based on long research over the years: 2003/2004-2006, 2006-2008, 2008-2010, Gender Harmony (GH) is introduced as the promising tools against gender violence due to it could reduce the cases up to 56%. Its journey since 2010 when first being introduced to public in 2010, has continued onwards although a bit slow lately due to financial and momentum. The second book written was in Bahasa Indonesia: Bagaimana Mencegah KDRT in 2011, which in a flash vanished from the market in just couple months after it's been launched by the Minister of Women Empowerment and Child Protection Republic of Indonesia during the celebration of International Women's Day 8 March 2011 at the General Assembly of IFMSA (Inernational Federation of Medical Student Association), Ancol Jakarta.

The next book in particular tpic of Gender Based Violence was written in English as the Fifth Gender Harmony (GH) book series after Gender Skateboard (Indonesia) and Gender Empowerment (English).

As typical GH book series, the readings were coming from true stories, testimonies and or observation cases which been discussed in practical language as examples of daily living challenges that could be solved accordingly based on GH principles in delivering knowledge, creating mindset, building communication and coping mechanism to overcome any crisis within proper attitutes and best practices.

The GBV book contains about 350 pages, full of stories and lesson learnts to prevent Gender Based Violence (GBV) and or handling it for secondary prevention after it's happened.

To be noted carefully, many women or men did not realize they were in the violence atmosphere within their family life, social life or community life. The indicator is un-peaceful life, uncomfortable, loosing bargaining power to their own basc human rights and eventually this led to depression disorder and unhapinness life.

Lack of information about basic human rights made people neglected their condition to respect, fulfill and protect the rights, such as: right to health, right to preference, right to privacy, right to have leisure time, right to choose, have voice and so on. The main strong platform of basic human rights to respect people is taken by GH with faith that nobody asked to be born, they were born free with dignity, due to the blessings from God the Creator that's why they are precious! That's why we are equal, as the same human being, although old or young, beauty or ugly; normal or disable - we all are precious in God's plan to the living environment. Give respect to it!

The understanding (knowledge) of the above starting point somehow missing in most human development; that's why social stratification started even in personal relationship in one family, between gender: male and female, boys and girls, tallented and less tallented, rich or poor and so on - these were brought accordingly into the community, nation and global world. People forgot when they were fighting each other wanted to get victory, at the end only him/ her with the creator to face hell or heaven. Life is not always full of flowers, however when love and respect to other human being was implemented, the life could be easier taken and harmony could be created towards peaceful life as promised by God (Re: Roma 12:18 by reading from verse 9-21).

Thyere is no day without a problem! Therefore spouses, siblings, friends, co-workers may gain peaceful life when started to implement GH in their social life from day to day. The root of violence was born due to discrepancy of hopes and reality which was not coped by the proper knowledge and mindset about human being which been created by God within love and good purposes. Feeling of illegitimated, being marginalized and or humiliated may not occurs if egalitarian ethos was practiced and implemented. Nobody is perfect, to err is human and to forgive is divine! We are living day by day to reach perfectness as prayed by Jesus to the Lord (Johannes 17:23); thus we must change to be better today compared to yesterday, tomorrow compared to today!

Many people never realized their life is changing over the days due to jobs, income, children, experiences, health, physical, mental and so on. However they were late to adjust the hope and acceptance to the spouse, partner, children, parents, friends and so on whose actually their love ones.  Accept them as human being as the same as ourselves! To help each other is the meaning of living together, otherwise what a husband/ wife/ children/ parents/ friends for? (See: Max Weber principles in the GBV book)

To get practice for suitable coping mechanism is a learning process; likely kid started learning to sit, stand, walk and run; after they were grown up and became adult many people also fell and had broken leg though. Thus facing a life-journey together is a success of overcome stressors over the crisis into transformation (See: Gender transformation in the GBV book)

You may want to read the GBV book about many cases of success and failures; with hopes you might take the success only!

Here are some testimony:

—Urmila (India) - I have started reading the books that I have bought from you and I believe I am learning a lot in concept and clarity. I am confident this will help me hugely in my training, my work and my communication. The books are a great job! So congratulations!
Margaret (Malaysia) - Thank you for giving us the opportunity to participate in the Gender Harmony Workshop. We brought back new ideas, new insights, hopefully new mindsets and many sweet memories of events and people we met. We pledged to share with our members what we have gained over the four days. God willing we are able to raise fund and look for generous sponsors to help fund our programmein 2017. Do keep in touch with us and God bless you and your work.
——Akiko (Japan) -  Thank you for everything that you gave me through this program. I hope to keep in touch.
—Bertha (Cameroon) -  my organisation organised event on Gender Equality  with the theme" Gender Harmony for Gender Empowerment :  a solution for peace, love and security in the family and the community" .  My target group was the youths and many of them came out. Some of them were learning of  Gender  Harmony for the first time and many men and boys appreciated the whole idea. Thanks to  the  Gender  Harmony  Foundation.
—Maria (Argentina) – I wished that I know Gender Harmony before so I didn’t have to waste my time fighting with my husband.
—Dwi(Indonesia) – I followed Gender Harmony practices, and for the first time on my 13 years of marriage life my husband brought me a glass of water..
Fanny (Indonesia) - After attending the Gender Harmony session with my husband, I was so thankful and grateful my husband was changed. He opened the gate by himself while before he even upset to me when I was late opening it for him.

Having a "life" is started from self-awareness only, thus we must respect self-life first, having good relationship with the creator as spirituality to enhance dignity as human being; then only we can respect others share the blessings and create synergy. If you have nothing, nothing you can give. We may not do everything , however together we may do something! GH principles build family resilience, make people stronger in taking the life journey jumping over poverty line, free from domestic violence, a peaceful life  towards family welfare!

No Rights No harmony, No Harmony No Peace, No Peace No happiness!


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